child-ish

i believe i'm always a strong person... having overcame some depressing and bad experiences in life. 

but being a strong person doesn't mean i would not feel sad and lonely at times, shed tears and just be emotional once in a while...

and when i do, does it mean i'm being child-ish...? as much as i can i always try to be cool and strong... i can also be vulnerable but not child-ish...

my full marathon training schedule

an addition to my bucketlist, which is still to be updated as i have more to come ;) is to run a full marathon...

i've been joining running events for over a year now in various distances, from 10km to 21km... and i wanted to feel and experience how it would be being full crazy, that is to run a full marathon...

i found this 20 weeks intermediate run marathon training plan that can be customized for the upcoming race day. but i have to modify it to accommodate my monthly visitor...

week 1 to week 10

my day 1 started yesterday and i hope to have determination and discipline to go on with this schedule and run the full marathon for standard chartered this coming december 1...

week 11 to week 20, the race day..!!!

encouragement and inspiration are welcome to help me finish the race and fulfill this from my bucketlist...

gift

i feel so happy and grateful every time i receive gift(s)...

but this time, it's my turn to give myself something... i've been thinking of rewarding myself of something after completing half marathon for standard chartered marathon 2012... 

finally, i got myself something :)) it's an all-in-one gift for myself :)) sometimes we deserve something good for our self...

i'm back

i missed my blog site... i'll try to blog again as much as i can...

oh by the way, i had a very great and an awesome holiday with my baby...
i never had the chance to go online when he was here as i want to spend every minute of the very short trip he had...

'twas the most awesome xmas and new year i have :D missin' him a lot though...

i'm back :)

frustrated :(

yesterday, i left the office early to go to philippine embassy to get an oec(overseas employment certification).

i walked as fast as i can, even if my legs' still ache from my last sundays' marathon, to be able to reach there before 5pm. i reached there just around 4pm catching my breath and sweating. but i was so frustrated when i read a notice at the gate that processing for oec is closed as they already had hit their quota for the day... i felt so weak and i wanted to cry :(

but one thing i've learned, they already had set up an online appointment which is easier, faster and cutting off the long queue... had i check online before going there it could have been better...

and so i just left and went on my other errands for the day...

bohol & cebu city 2012 with nanay

nanay turned 60 last march 27… we celebrated it my way ;) she usually prepares a lot of yummy food for her birthday and invites her friend to come over. she just love to cook specially on her birthday. she would be busy the day before and on the day itself, and you would hear her say, "i'm tired of being beautiful..." when everyone's gone :)) 

early morning walk along alona beach at panglao island

but this year was different, i took her with me to bohol for a trip. just the two of us... we stayed at bohol for two nights and three days. 

sandugo (blood compact) statue

left: baclayon church,built in the 18th century
right: the shiphaus

butterfly garden

we had fun exploring the island. we had fun sitting by the shore at night having our barbeque, looking at some other tourists, the fire dance, the breeze coming from the sea and the early morning walk... things we missed on our trip, island hop and swimming :( but it's fine we still had fun... 

nanay having so much fun on loboc river cruise stop-over

tarsier conservation area

man-made forest of mahogany along the way

we also stayed for a night at cebu city. we met up with kuya lokie, my former colleague at rafi (ramon aboitiz foundation, inc.), his wife ate tata and chubby/talkative daughter nikki... they helped us get a place to spend the night. after having dinner with them, nanay & me shopped a little and watched the last screening of the hunger games at ayala mall. 

the famous chocolate hills

i'm so glad and happy that nanay had so much fun on our first ever trip together... 

tardiness

i've been late for work but not because i woke up late or missed the bus...

lately, i've been riding the car of my colleague  the boss' brother-in-law, in the morning and this is the second time i'm late for work...

i should have learned from the first time that when his car is not park in front of the house it's stolen again by his son and would be coming home very late...

now, it's past 8am and i'm supposed to be sitting in the office instead of waiting for that car to come back...

this is the last time i'll be fooled...

missed calls

i am sad :(

yesterday, i called nanay when i reached home but she did not pick up. it's been few days since we had our last talk...

also, i tried to call brad for few times last night but all i hear were the ring and the voice saying, "you have reached the voicemail box of brad"...

i miss you guys... hope to talk to both of you today...

"@Notebook: I hate going an entire day without talking to you."

forgiveness

"forgiveness is the only way to get rid of the past. that's one of the values of prayer. it helps you unload, forgive those who have hurt you and let it go so you can get on with life." this is part of my devotional reading this morning by rick warren and i was so inspired by it. indeed, it is true...

while i was enjoying my holiday at bangkok last february 2011, i had a chat with my cousin michelle. that chat lead her to a revelation that she was not willing to spill while i was still on that holiday. but i was persistent and i assured her that i'll be fine...

a revelation that changed the course of my life. it took a lot of courage for her to tell me that my boyfriend for like 10 to 11 years had been cheating on me. i was a bit shocked knowing it, 'coz through out that relationship, a third-party had never been an issue between us. i had so much trust on him that i never thought he could do it...

we were about to get married on july of the same year, but i called-it off... one betrayal is enough to end that relationship. no matter how long we've been together...

i still went home as scheduled and met up with him and settled some few things.

and one thing that i've been wanting to do when i see him is to forgive him even if he would not ask for it.  and i'm so happy i was able to. i've been praying for guidance and strength for me to forgive him. i don't want to live and go on with my life with resentment towards him because of what he has done. i wanted to live life happily. i wanted to meet someone else who deserves me and that someone i deserved as well. and i thought i will not be able to until i forgive him...

glad i'm brave enough to forgive him... and so i'm living a happy life now. smiling everyday knowing that someone loves me this much.

if we can, let us forgive those who have hurt us as much as God the Son offered His life on the cross to forgive our sins.

bangkok, thailand - january/february 2011

shortly after phuket, i was on my way to krung thep. where is that? bangkok, the city capital of thailand. i went there for a long week holiday in time for chinese new year. 

nabs picked me up at the airport and we head straight to the church and had a wonderful sabbath. i stayed with them over the weekend. i also had the chance to meet blissyl and her family. 

with nabs, bliss & their cuties :)

monday, i met up with laurence, who was then working at united nations-bangkok hq, and stayed on his place for the rest of my stay. as laurence was working so i had the opportunity again to wonder and to explore the city on my own. 

ananta samakom throne hall

vimanmek mansion

riding the bus and train and alighting on the place where i wanted to go was quite an adventure for me. left a city zoo and wandered around nearby tourist destinations and walked until i arrived at laurence's workplace at un hq having only a city map with me, was a cool experience. 

wandering after lau's work

i went on board a small ferry along chao phraya river and visit wat pho, the grand palace, wat phra kaew and temple of dawn.

wat pho, the temple of the reclining buddha

the grand palace

wat phra kaew

temple of dawn

this trip was not all smiles and laughters, shopping and wandering. there were also tears and decisions made that make me a stronger person. but i did not let it spoil my long week holiday, i just put it at the back of my mind and enjoyed first. thankful for all the very good friends i have from all over for the comfort that time... 

anyway, i still had a good thai experience... the crowd, the massage, the food and very good friends.  

growing in Jesus

i like this song for a while now... it teaches and reminds me as i grow in Jesus everyday. 

it takes a lot of growing

for a tree to reach the sky

it takes a lot of rain to help it grow

it takes a lot of running

for a child to catch the wind

it takes a lot of walking to learn to run

and i'm growing in Jesus

getting stronger each and everyday in every way

cos' Jesus is growing in me

many times i feel discouraged

when the rain got in my way

i didn't know that it would help me grow

and everytime i run ahead

i always miss a turn

and end up walking backwards

while I learn

and i'm growing in Jesus

getting stronger each and everyday in every way

cos' Jesus is growing in me

and i'm growing in Jesus

getting stronger each and everyday in every way

cos' Jesus is growing in me

you're missed

happy birthday, babes... it's supposed to be your 31st today. you're always in our thoughts, me and nanay, and i believe all of your closest friends...

life could have been happier if you're still around. we always love and miss you...

weakness

today is a rough day :( 
a senior old colleague scolded me for something. everyone in the office knows his attitude, he tends to flare up if something didn't go according his way. he is on sales and he has few potential customers for the company… 
i've been doing things for him, estimates, draws layouts & single line diagrams, prepares d/o and I've been patient and handled him for three years now. nobody else is willing to do things for him… 
but today is just different. he asked me of a single line diagram he insisted he told me to revised but i never drawn any single line he is asking me of. a single line he said he gave me the other day, which falls on saturday, and we don't work on saturdays... 
he started to shout, talked something bad and heard him call me a stupid girl... 
one of my weakness is, if anyone shouts on me that will immediately trigger me to cry... 
so i was crying for like more than an hour this morning... 
one thing i didn't like about what happened, i answered him back and insisted my arguments. i felt guilty about it because he is old and he is supposed to be someone i must respect. i'm not the kind of person who usually do such things. i felt bad after...
but i thought right at that instant that i also deserved to be respected by him even if i'm just his subordinate and is way so young than him. i might be probably younger than his children... 
thanks to some of them here, who consoled me by saying, "please cool down, it's fine, he is always like that... you know his attitude...", "he is not worthy, so don't mind him...", "you're strong, don't let him ruin your day..."
but i am fine after i released all those tears... it ruined my mascara though :( that i had to wash my face, hehehe...

father-less

me and my late sister grew up without a father. he left us when i was just two years old… some kids, had gone worst having a broken family. but it's not like that in all cases... especially, if we see how a single parent struggles and works hard for the kids left on her/him. 
life could be different on me had i grow up with a guide of a father. i could have been a better person or i could have been worst... 

where is our father..? why is it that other kids has a father and we don't...? few questions our mom should have answered  but she never heard us asked... we never dared to. i have so much respect on how she had brought us up from childhood to being an adult... 

(image taken from imdb app)

but don't get me wrong, i never hated my father, i just did not look or long for him... i am so much contented on how my mother loves us. 


but it is still great to have a complete and happy family… which i always long and hope for…

"courageous" is a touching and inspiring movie… it's a story of four police officers who struggle with their faith and their roles as husbands and fathers when tragedy strikes close to home, together they make  decision that will change all of their lives. fathers, be inspired...!

"...but as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord."--- Joshua 24:15 (niv)